I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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