just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
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