whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.