I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I CAN MOONWALK!
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
