i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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