he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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