and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
