carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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