we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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