I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
