ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
