I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Dignity is for republicans.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
