I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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