i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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