So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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