if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
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