We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
