I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
