I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
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