So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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