She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
This house was built for laser tag.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
