garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
