conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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