..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I can text with my tongue
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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