Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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