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• (517): View more from Michigan

  dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..

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• (954): View more from Florida

  i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time

  (1-908): View more from New Jersey

  I'll google it

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.

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• (705): View more from Ontario

  I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  I need a hug and tequila

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  This is why we need to live in the same city again

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.

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• (716): View more from New York

  I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.

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