i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
it's great music for shaving your balls
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Randomize
