we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
