i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
