two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
this will be a night to untag.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.