Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
