Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
