please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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