What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
BRING THE BAGELS
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Randomize
