I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
