Soap is not a condiment
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I don't think brook has ever known best
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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