Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
