oh god the rape fog is back!
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
