he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
