she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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