how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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