chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
