why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
