it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where are you?
Hypothermia
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
After tacos, we're chasing women.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize