Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
