I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
