i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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