there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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