I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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