dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Pappa wants mamma naked
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
